Ignorance of the functions and powers of the mind is the cause of all marital trouble. Friction between husband and wife can be solved by each using the law of mind correctly. By praying together they stay together. The
contemplation of divine ideals, the study of the laws of life, the mutual
agreement on a common purpose and plan, and the enjoyment of personal freedom bring about that harmonious marriage, that wedded bliss, that
sense of oneness where the two become one.
The best time to prevent divorce is before marriage. It is not wrong to try
to get out of a very bad situation. But, why get into the bad situation in
the first place? Would it not be better to give attention to the real cause of
marital problems, in other words, to really get at the root of the matter
involved?
As with all other problems of men and women, the problems of divorce,
separation, annulment and endless litigation are directly traceable to lack
of knowledge of the working and interrelationship of the conscious and
subconscious mind.
Marriage to be real must first be on a spiritual basis. It must be of the
heart and the heart is the chalice of love. Honesty, sincerity, kindness and
integrity are also forms of love. Each partner should be perfectly honest
and sincere with the other. It is not a true marriage when a man marries
a woman for her money, social position, or to lift his ego, because this indicates a lack of security, honesty and true love. Such a marriage is a
farce, a sham and a masquerade.
When a woman says, “I am tired of working; I want to get married because I want security,” her premise is false. She is not using the laws of
mind correctly. Her security depends upon her knowledge of the interaction of the conscious and subconscious mind and its application.
For example, a woman will never lack for wealth or health if she applies
the techniques outlined in the respective chapters of this book. Her wealth
can come to her independent of her husband, father or anyone else. A
woman is not dependent on her husband for health, peace, joy, inspiration, guidance, love, wealth, security, happiness or anything in the world.
Her security and peace of mind come from her knowledge of the inner
powers within her and from the constant use of the laws of her own mind
in a constructive fashion.
You are now acquainted with the way your subconscious mind works. You
know that whatever you impress upon it will be experienced in your
world. Begin now to impress your subconscious mind with the qualities
and characteristics you desire in a man.
The following is an excellent technique: Sit down at night in your armchair, close your eyes, let go, relax your body, become very quiet, passive
and receptive. Talk to your subconscious mind and say to it, “I am now
attracting a man into my experience who is hones, sincere, loyal, faithful,
peaceful, happy and prosperous. These qualities which I admire are sinking down into my subconscious mind now. As I dwell upon these characteristics, they become a part of me and are embodied subconsciously.
“I know there is an irresistible law of attraction and that I attract to me a
man according to my subconscious belief. I attract that which I feel to be
true in my subconscious mind.
“I know I can contribute to his peace and happiness. He loves my ideals,
and I love his ideals. He does not want to make me over, neither do I
want to make him over. There is mutual love, freedom and respect.”
Practice this process of impregnating your subconscious. Then, you will
have the joy of attracting to you a man possessing the qualities and characteristics you mentally dwelt upon. Your subconscious intelligence will
open up a pathway, whereby both of you will meet, according to the irresistible and changeless flow of your own subconscious mind. Have a keen
desire to give the best that is in you of love, devotion and cooperation.
Be receptive to this gift of love which you have given to your subconscious
mind.
Affirm as follows: “I now attract the right woman who is in complete accord with me. This is a spiritual union because it is divine love functioning
through the personality of someone with whom I blend perfectly. I know I
can give to this woman love, light, peace and joy. I feel and believe I can
make this woman’s life full, complete and wonderful.
“I now decree that she possesses the following qualities and attributes:
She is spiritual, loyal, faithful and true. She is harmonious, peaceful and
happy. We are irresistibly attracted to each other. Only that which belongs
to love, truth and beauty can enter my experience. I accept my ideal
companion now.”
As you think quietly and with interest on the qualities and attributes which
you admire in the companion you seek, you will build the mental equivalent into your mentality. Then, the deeper currents of your subconscious
mind will bring both of you together in divine order.
Recently a teacher said to me, “I have had three husbands and all three
have been passive, submissive and dependent on me to make all decisions and govern everything. Why do I attract such type men?”
I asked her whether she had known that her second husband was he effeminate type, and she replied, “Of course not. Had I known, I would not
have married him.” Apparently she had not learned anything from the first
mistake. The trouble was with her own personality make up. She was
very masculine, domineering and unconsciously wanted someone who
would be submissive and passive so that she could play the dominant
role. All this was unconscious motivation, and her subconscious picture attracted to her what she subjectively wanted. She had to learn to break
the pattern by adopting the right prayer process.
the above-mentioned woman learned a simple truth. When you believe
you can have the type of man you idealize, it is done unto you as your believe. The following is the specific prayer she used to break the old subconscious pattern and attract to her the ideal mate: “I am building into
my mentality the type of man I deeply desire. The man I attract for a
husband is strong, powerful, loving, very masculine, successful, honest,
loyal and faithful. He finds love and happiness with me. I love to follow
where he leads.
“I know he wants me, and I want him. I am honest, sincere, loving and
kind. I have wonderful gifts to offer him. They are good will, a joyous
heart and a healthy body. He offers me the same. It is mutual, I give and
I receive. Divine Intelligence knows where this man is, and the deeper
wisdom of my subconscious mind is now bringing both of us together in
its own way and we recognize each other immediately. I release this request to my subconscious mind which knows how to bring my request to
pass. I give thanks for the perfect answer.”
She prayed in the above manner night and morning, affirming these
truths and knowing that through frequent occupation of the mind she
would reach the mental equivalent of that which she sought.
Several months went by. She had a great number of dates and social engagements, none of which was agreeable to her. When she was about to
question, waiver, doubt and vacillate, she reminded herself that the Infinite Intelligence was bringing it to pass in its own way and that there was
nothing to be concerned about. Her final decree in her divorce proceedings was granted which brought her a great sense of release and mental
freedom. Shortly afterward she went to work as a receptionist in a doctor’s office.
She told me that the minute she saw the physician she knew he was the
man she was praying about. Apparently he knew it too, because he proposed to her the first week she was in the office and their subsequent
marriage was ideally happy. This physician was not the passive or submissive type, but was a real man, a former football player, an outstanding
athlete and was a deeply spiritual man though he was completely devoid
of any sectarian or denominational affiliation.
She got what she prayed for because she claimed it mentally until she
reached the point of saturation. In other words, she mentally and emotionally united with her idea, and it become a part of her in the same way
that an apple becomes a part of her blood stream.
Divorce is an individual problem. It cannot be generalized. In some cases,
of course, there never should have been a marriage. In some cases, divorce is not the solution, no more so than marriage is the solution for a
lonely man. Divorce may be right for one person and wrong for another. A
divorced woman may be far more sincere and noble than may of her married sisters who perhaps are living a lie.
For example, I once talked with a woman who husband was a dope fiend,
an ex-convict, a wife beater and a non provider. She had been told it was
wrong to get a divorce. I explained to her that marriage is of the heart. If
two hearts blend harmoniously, lovingly and sincerely, that is the ideal
marriage. The pure action of the heart is love.
Following this explanation she knew what to do. She knew in her heart
that there is no divine law which compelled her to be browbeaten, intimidated and beaten because someone said, “I pronounce you man and
wife.” If you are in doubt as to what to do, ask for guidance, knowing that
there is always an answer, and you will receive it. Follow the lead that
comes to you in the silence of your soul. It speaks to you in peace.
Recently a young couple, married only for a few months, were seeking a
divorce. I discovered that the young man had a constant fear that his wife
would leave him. He expected rejection and he believed that she would be
unfaithful. These thoughts haunted his mind and became an obsession
with him. His mental attitude was one of separation and suspicion. She
felt unresponsive to him; it was his own feeling or atmosphere of loss and
separation operating through them. This brought about a condition or action in accordance with the mental pattern behind it. There is a law of action and reaction, or cause and effect. The thought is the action and the
response of the subconscious mind is the reaction. His wife left home and asked for a divorce which is what he feared and
believed she would do.