Helen waved her hand dismissively. “Oh, Sharon won’t mind,” she said, plonking herself down on the chair and squashing Holly’s new handbag. Sharon made her way over to the table and stuck out her bottom lip in disappointment. Holly apologized and motioned over to Helen as her excuse. Sharon rolled her eyes and stuck her fingers in her mouth and pretended to gag. Holly giggled.

“Well, you’re in high spirits,” Jamie announced to Holly, sounding very unimpressed.

“Is there any reason why I shouldn’t be?” Holly replied tartly.

Jamie answered with some smart retort that a few people laughed at because he was “so funny,”

and Holly ignored him. She didn’t find him funny anymore, though she and Gerry had always been among those people who hung on his every word. Now he was just being stupid.

“Are you OK?” Daniel asked quietly from beside her.

“Yes I’m fine, thank you,” she replied, taking a sip of wine.

“Oh, you don’t have to give me that bullshit answer, Holly. It’s me,” he laughed.

Holly smiled and groaned. “People are being very nice and all by offering me their sympathies,”

she lowered her voice to a whisper so Helen couldn’t hear, “but I feel like I’m back at his funeral again. Having to pretend to be all strong and superwoman-like even though all some of them want is for me to be devastated because it’s so awful. ” She mimicked Jennifer and rolled her eyes. “And then there are the people who don’t know about Gerry and this is so not the place to have to tell them.” Daniel listened to her patiently.

He nodded when she finally stopped talking. “I understand what you’re saying. When Laura and I broke up I felt that for months everywhere I went I was telling people that we had broken up.

But the good thing is that eventually word goes around so you can stop having those awkward conversations with people all the time.”

“Any word on Laura by the way?” Holly asked. She enjoyed having bitching sessions about Laura even though she had never met her. She loved to hear stories about her from Daniel and then the two of them would spend the night talking about how much they hated her. It passed the time, and right now Holly really needed something to avoid having to talk to Helen.

Daniel’s eyes lit up. “Yes, actually I do have a bit of gossip about her,” he laughed.

“Oooh good, I love a bit of gossip,” Holly said, rubbing her hands together with delight.

“Well, a friend of mine named Charlie who works as a barman in Laura’s dad’s hotel told me that her boyfriend tried to come on to some other woman who was a guest in the hotel and Laura caught him, so they split up.” He laughed evilly and had a twinkle in his eye. He was delighted to hear of her heartbreak.

Holly froze because that story sounded rather familiar. “Eh . . . Daniel, what hotel does her father own?”

“Oh, the Galway Inn. It’s a real kip of a place but it’s in a nice area, across the road from the beach.”

“Oh.” Holly didn’t know what to say and her eyes widened.

“I know,” Daniel laughed. “It’s brilliant, isn’t it? I can tell you, if I ever met the woman who split them up I would buy her the most expensive bottle of champagne I could find.”

Holly smiled weakly, “Would you now . . .” He better start saving his money then . . . Holly stared at Daniel’s face curiously, interested to know why on earth Daniel had once been interested in Laura. Holly would have bet all her money against those two ever being together; she didn’t seem his type, whatever his “type” was. Daniel was so easygoing and friendly and Laura was . . . well, Laura was a bitch. Holly couldn’t think of any other word to describe her.

“Em, Daniel?” Holly nervously tucked her hair behind her ears, preparing herself to question him on his choice of women.

He smiled at her, eyes still twinkling from the news of his ex-girlfriend and ex–best friend’s breakup. “Yes, Holly.”

“Well, I was just wondering. Laura seems to sound like a bit of a . . . em . . . a . . . bitch, to be honest.” She bit her lip and studied his face to see if she had insulted him. His face was blank as he stared at the candlesticks in the center of the table and listened. “Well,” she continued, feeling as though she had to tiptoe carefully around this subject, knowing how badly Laura had broken Daniel’s heart. “Well, my question is really, what ever did you see in her? How could you two ever have been in love? You’re both so different, well, at least you sound like you’re so different.” She backpedaled fast, remembering she wasn’t supposed to have ever met Laura.

Daniel was silent for a moment and Holly feared she had stepped into the wrong territory.

He dragged his eyes away from the flame dancing around on the candlestick to face Holly. His lips broke into a sad smile. “Laura isn’t really a bitch, Holly. Well, for leaving me for my best friend she is . . . but as a person, when we were together, she was never a bitch. Dramatic, yes.

A bitch, no.” He smiled and turned his body around to face Holly properly. “You see, I loved the drama of our relationship. I found it exciting; she enthralled me.” His face became animated as he explained their relationship and his speech quickened with the excitement of the memory of his lost love. “I loved waking up in the morning and wondering what kind of mood she would be in that day, I loved our fights, I loved the passion of them and I loved how we would make love after them.” His eyes danced. “She would make a song and dance about most things, but I suppose that’s what I found different and attractive about her. I used to always tell myself that as long as she kept making a song and dance about our own relationship, then I knew she cared.

If she hadn’t, then it wouldn’t have been worth it really. I loved the drama,” he repeated, believing himself even more this time. “Our temperaments contrasted, but we made a good team; you know what they say about opposites attracting . . .” He looked into the face of his new friend and saw her concern. “She didn’t treat me badly, Holly, she wasn’t a bitch in that way . . .” He smiled more to himself. “She was just . . .”

“Dramatic,” Holly finished for him, finally understanding. He nodded.

Holly watched his face as he got lost in another memory. She supposed it was possible for anybody to love anybody. That was the great thing about love; it came in all different shapes, sizes and temperaments.

“You miss her,” Holly said gently, putting her hand on his arm.

Daniel snapped out of his daydream and stared deeply into Holly’s eyes. A shiver went down her spine and she felt the hairs on her arms stand up. He snorted loudly and twisted back around in his chair, “Wrong again, Holly Kennedy.” He nodded his head and frowned, as though she had said the most bizarre thing ever. “Completely and utterly wrong.” He picked up his knife and fork and began to eat his salmon starter. Holly gulped back some cool water and turned her attention to the plate that was being set before her.

After dinner and a few bottles of wine Helen stumbled over to Holly, who had escaped over to Sharon and Denise’s side of the table. She gave her a big hug and tearily apologized for not keeping in touch.

“That’s OK, Helen. Sharon, Denise and John have been very supportive friends, so I wasn’t alone.”

“Oh, but I feel so awful,” Helen slurred.

“Don’t,” Holly said, anxious to continue her enjoyable conversation with the girls.

But Helen insisted on talking about the good old times when Gerry was alive and when everything was rosy. She talked about all the times that she and Gerry had shared together, which were memories that Holly wasn’t particularly interested in. Eventually Holly had enough of Helen’s tearful whinging and realized that all her friends were up having fun on the dance floor.

“Helen, please stop,” Holly finally interrupted. “I don’t know why you feel you have to discuss this with me tonight when I am trying to enjoy myself, but you obviously feel guilty for not keeping in touch with me. To be honest, I think that if I hadn’t come to this ball tonight I still wouldn’t have heard from you for another ten months and more. And that’s not the kind of friend I need in my life. So please stop crying on my shoulder and let me enjoy myself.”

Holly felt that she had phrased it reasonably, but Helen looked like she had been slapped in the face. A small dose of what Holly had felt for the past year. Daniel appeared out of nowhere, took Holly by the hand and led her to the dance floor to join all her friends. As soon as they reached the dance floor the song ended and Eric Clapton’s “Wonderful Tonight” began. The dance floor began to empty out bar a few couples and Holly was left facing Daniel. She gulped.

She hadn’t planned on this. She had only ever danced with Gerry to this song.

Daniel placed his hand lightly on her waist and gently took her hand and they began to circle around. Holly was stiff. Dancing with another man felt wrong. A tingle went down her spine and she shuddered. Daniel must have thought she was cold and he pulled her closer to keep her warm. She was led around the floor in a trance until the song ended and she made the excuse of having to go to the toilet. She locked herself in the cubicle and leaned against the door taking deep breaths. She had been doing so well up until now. Even with everyone asking her about Gerry she had remained calm. But the dance had shaken her. Perhaps it was time to go home while the going was good. She was about to unlock the door when she heard a voice outside say her name. She froze and listened to the women chatting outside.

“Did you see Holly Kennedy dancing with that man tonight?” a voice asked. The unmistakable whine of Jennifer.

“I know!” another voice spoke with a tone of disgust. “And her husband not yet cold in his grave!”

“Ah leave her alone,” another woman said lightheartedly, “they could just be friends.”

Thank you, Holly thought.

“But I doubt it,” she continued and the women giggled.

“Did you see the way they were wrapped around each other? I don’t dance with any of my friends like that,” Jennifer said.

“That’s disgraceful,” another woman said. “Imagine flaunting your new man in a place you used to come to with your husband in front of all his friends. It’s disgusting.” The women tutted and a toilet flushed in the cubicle beside Holly. She stood frozen in her position, shocked by what she was hearing and embarrassed they were saying it where others could hear.

The toilet door opened beside her and the women were silenced. “Would you bickering old bitches ever go and get yourselves lives?” Sharon’s voice yelled. “It is absolutely no business of yours what my best friend does or does not do! Jennifer, if your life was so bloody perfect then what are you doing sneaking around with Pauline’s husband?”

Holly heard someone gasp. It was probably Pauline.

Holly covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing.

“Right, so keep your noses in your own business and piss off the lot of you!” Sharon yelled.

When Holly felt she had heard everyone leave she unlocked the door and stepped outside.

Sharon looked up at her from the sink in shock.

“Thanks, Sharon.”

“Oh Holly, I’m sorry you had to hear that,” she said, giving her friend a hug.

“It doesn’t matter, I couldn’t give a crap what they think,” Holly said bravely. “But I can’t believe Jenny is having an affair with Pauline’s husband!” Holly said, shocked.

Sharon shrugged, “She’s not, but it’ll give them something to bitch about for the next few months.”

The girls giggled.

“I think I’ll go home now, though,” Holly said, glancing at her watch and thinking about the final message from Gerry. Her heart sank.

“Good idea,” Sharon agreed. “I didn’t realize how shite this ball was when you’re sober.”

Holly smiled.

“Anyway, you were great tonight, Holly. You came, you conquered, now go home and open Gerry’s message. Ring me and let me know what it says.” She hugged her friend again.

“It’s the last one,” Holly said sadly.

“I know, so enjoy it,” Sharon smiled. “But memories last a lifetime, remember that.”

Holly made her way back to the table to say good-bye to everyone and Daniel stood up to leave with her. “You’re not leaving me here on my own,” he laughed. “We can share a cab.”

Holly was slightly irritated when Daniel hopped out of the taxi and followed her to her house, as she was looking forward to opening the envelope from Gerry. It was a quarter to twelve, which gave her fifteen minutes. She hoped he would drink his tea and be gone by then. She even called another taxi to arrive at her house in half an hour, just to let him know he couldn’t stay too long.

“Ah, so this is the famous envelope,” Daniel said, picking the tiny envelope up from the table.

Holly’s eyes widened; she felt protective over that envelope, and she wasn’t happy with him touching it, removing Gerry’s trace from it.

“December,” he said, reading the outside and running his fingers along the lettering. Holly wanted to tell him to put it down but didn’t want to sound psychotic. Eventually he placed it back on the table and she breathed a sigh of relief and continued to fill the kettle with water.

“How many more envelopes are left?” Daniel asked, taking his overcoat off and walking over to join her at the kitchen counter.

“That’s the last one.” Holly’s voice was husky and she cleared her throat.

“So what are you going to do after that?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, feeling confused.

“Well, as far as I can see, that list is like your bible, your ten commandments. What the list says goes, as far as your life is concerned. So what will you do when there aren’t any more?”

Holly looked up at his face to see if he was being smart, but his blue eyes twinkled back at her.

“I’ll just live my life,” she replied, turning her back and flicking the switch on the kettle.

“Will you be able to do that?” he walked closer to her and she could smell his aftershave. It was a real Daniel smell.

“I suppose so,” she replied, confused and uncomfortable by his questions.

“Because you will have to make your own decisions then,” he said softly.

“I know that,” she said defensively, avoiding eye contact with him.

“And do you think you’ll be able to do that?”

Holly rubbed her face tiredly. “Daniel, what’s this about?”

He swallowed hard and adjusted his stance before her, trying to make himself comfortable. “I’m asking you this because I’m going to say something to you now, and you are going to have to make your own decision.” He looked her straight in the eye and her heart beat wildly. “There will be no list, no guidelines; you will just have to follow your own heart.”

Holly backed away from him a little. A feeling of dread pulled at her heart and she hoped he wasn’t going to say what she thought he was about to say.

“Em . . . Daniel . . . I d-don’t think that this is . . . the right time to . . . um . . . we shouldn’t talk about . . .”

“This is a perfect time,” he said seriously. “You already know what I’m going to say to you, Holly, and I know you already know how I feel about you.”

Holly’s mouth dropped open and she glanced at the clock.

It was twelve o’clock.