Gemini North Node people have had two very different kinds of
past life experiences with one common denominator: the pursuit of
truth. They have had incarnations where they pursued Truth on their
own—as traveling sadhus in India, wandering nomads in the desert,
hermits, or simple people going into the wilderness alone to learn
nature’s secrets. They have also had many incarnations seeking
Truth as a collective ideal, becoming absorbed in religious
organizations. Either way, seeking after Truth, spirituality, ethics,
and enlightenment has motivated their entire lives, and society and
human relationships were neglected.
These folks have had many incarnations as Philosopher Kings.
Lifetime after lifetime, whether Buddhist, Hebrew, Moslem, or
Christian, they left everyone around them to pursue Truth. This is
why, in this life, they still tend to leave everyone and go off on their
own. All throughout their previous incarnations they sought
enlightenment—climbing to the top of the mountain to reach the
pinnacle of Truth. But after so many incarnations with the same
focus, they found it! There’s no need for them to continue the
search in this lifetime. In the end, on their mountaintop, they
became isolated and lonely. Now, in this lifetime, the challenge is to
share their Truth, rejoining society and staying connected with
others.
Self-righteousness can be Gemini North Nodes’ biggest
stumbling block to effectively relating to people and feeling the
peace and love that are inherent in true connectedness. As they were
philosophers and priests in past lives, other people followed their
instructions. They are used to being regarded as always being
“right” without question, so it is understandable that they enter this
incarnation with a certain arrogance. However, other people can
sense this superior attitude, and this prevents them from listening to
the Gemini North Node person. As a result, Gemini North Node
people start to feel that other people are undervaluing their
intelligence because they won’t listen. This is an example of how
they suffer from a communication problem.
Due to the loneliness and isolation of their past lives, Gemini
North Node people may seem like they can carry on hours of
conversation all by themselves. They may remember to ask the
other person a generalized question such as “How’s it going?” but if
the other person turns the attention back on them, they take the
opportunity and run with it. They can go on and on about
everything that’s happening in their lives, recount their memories,
tell a dozen stories and emerge the hero in every one . . . without the
other person adding a single word to the conversation. Never
getting a chance to interact or share his or her own story, the other
person loses interest in the Gemini North Node person.
After so many lifetimes of being lonely, these folks feel a need to
talk constantly. They are not comfortable with silence because they
associate it with isolation. Now they want to relate to other people;
so if there’s a silence in the interaction, they feel like there’s a
“problem” and will talk about anything simply to fill the void.
They are learning that conversation is a process of skillful
interaction: It has to do with sharing one’s point of view with a
sensitivity to how the other person is hearing it, inviting response,
and being open to feedback. These folks need to remember to shine
the spotlight on other people from time to time, asking them
questions about their lives and sharing a point of view about the
others’ lives that might be helpful. If Gemini North Node people
keep the spotlight on themselves for too long, they lose the energy
the other people add to the interaction. When they feel this loss of
energy, it should signal them to let the other person talk.
Conversation is like breathing—an inhale andan exhale; Gemini
North Node is learning that both people should have a chance to
participate regardless of which person is the focus of attention.
For example, when telling someone about a confrontation they
had with a co-worker, they could say: “What do you think about
that? Do you think I judged the situation correctly?” After the other
person responds, they could ask: “How was your day? Was it
peaceful or did you also have confrontations?” If they think the
other person doesn’t want to talk, they need to check it out by
asking: “Would you rather not talk about this, or do you have
something else on your mind?” To keep the vitality going in a
conversation, both people must be actively involved. Once these
folks get the idea of how conversation works, they become experts
at it.
Gemini North Node people are learning to see communication as
a vehicle for curiosity—wanting to learn about the other person.
They need to welcome input from others because, when combined
with their own ideas and insights, it can produce a truth that is more
powerful than either “truth” by itself.
Sometimes these folks appear combative. They think they have
something important to say and are afraid that they will not be
understood. So they put a lot of enthusiasm and energy into the
communication to be sure they get their point across. They can
become so fiery and adamant that others may feel attacked and
respond defensively. Then, because the other person appears to be
resisting their communication, they may become even more
adamant until the interaction escalates in an irrational, overly
emotional way. But they need to recognize that it’s their
presentation that is being resisted, not their point of view.
Gemini North Node people have a tendency to speak in a very
direct manner—delivering their opinion as unalterable Truth—and
any discussion of their Truth can lead to an argument. They may
actually enjoy this and consider it a stimulating interchange of
ideas, whereas the other person may see it as an empty battle of
wits. This can keep them from interacting with friends on a daily
basis, because people get tired of the battle after a while. Gemini
North Node people need to learn to pull back and listen more
carefully to the other person. They need to recognize that their
strength is in clear quiet thought, not emotion. Their insights (when
they have heard the correct question) are often powerful, accurate
solutions, and when they speak them in a nondramatic way, the
power of the idea can really be heard.
These people need to credit the intelligence of other people and
trust that they will recognize Truth without it being jammed down
their throats. Gemini North Node people are learning the
importance of replacing impatience with respect if they wish to
truly get their point across and connect with people successfully.
Another reason these folks are so ardent in the delivery of their
ideas is that they want acknowledgment that their Truth is “right.” It
validates their self-esteem and helps them to relax to know that their
viewpoint is accepted. But these folks need to recognize that Truth
stands on its own merit and doesn’t need energy from their egos to
propel it, or fanfare to signal its accuracy. In fact, the more quietly
Truth can be delivered, the better, so that the other person feels the
serenity to receive it. Regardless of how noble their motive is, these
folks may not use the fiery energy of personal ego to enforce their
point of view. Others simply won’t listen.
Gemini North Node people are learning to be patient with
themselves and others in working out glitches in communication.
They’re not used to talking. After all, they’ve been on
mountaintops; what do they know about communication? It’s as
though they’re speaking Latin while the people around them are
speaking English. They need to have patience and slow down, take
a few extra moments to translate, and really listen to what the other
person has said.
Most of their problems in communicating are caused by
inappropriate responses, which stem from not really hearing what
other people are saying. Here is a simple example: Gemini North
Node has a friend working in a booth at the County Fair who needs
to count out exactly 100 apples. As she’s counting—“67, 68, 69, 70
. . .”—people keep stopping by and interrupting her, and she loses
count. Well, the friend has a problem, so naturally the Gemini North
Node person will magically show up because he is a person with all
the answers! The friend says: “These apples are for the County Fair.
I need to count . . .” but the Gemini North Node person will hear the
first few words and not the rest. He assumes he knows what the
problem is, so he drifts off. He “comes back” when he notices the
other person has stopped talking, but since he never truly heard
what the problem was, he is likely to give an inappropriate answer:
“Oh, don’t worry about it—apples are two for a quarter down at the
fairgrounds!” The friend will be irritated, because she had a genuine
problem and wasn’t given the answer she needed. And the Gemini
North Node person will be frustrated because he went out of his
way to help and his friend didn’t appreciate it. Both people lost.
Instead of getting frustrated, the Gemini North Node person
needs to stop and think: “Okay—since she didn’t accept my answer,
that means I didn’t communicate effectively. Perhaps I didn’t fully
understand the problem.” He needs to return to the friend with an
apology: “Gosh, I’m sorry—maybe I didn’t really understand your
problem. Would you tell me again?” The friend will appreciate that
he cared enough to come back, and when they start communicating
again: “I need to count 100 apples for the fair,” the Gemini North
Node person can listen carefully and see the problem accurately.
Then he may suggest: “Well, why don’t you make ten piles of ten
apples each?” Instantly the friend will be relieved: “Thank you!
That’s the answer I was looking for!” When the other person
gratefully accepts the answer, there is a “high” for both parties and
both people win.
Often, these folks don’t realize the full impact of the messages
they deliver. In the above example, the friend may go home that
night and suddenly realize: “You know, that’s the reason my whole
life doesn’t work! I have it all jammed together, and what I need to
do is to organize it into smaller segments that I can deal with!”
Gemini North Node people must never judge any subject to be not
worth talking about. If someone is sincerely interested and seeking
information, these folks should always try to help the other person
find it. Gemini North Node people are bearers of Truth, and in
helping others find the information they seek, they often reveal a
larger Truth.
In past lives, freedom was very important for Gemini North
Node people—to discover their Truth they had to be free. Now they
have “tapes” in their subconscious that say over and over: “I’ve got
to be free; I’ve got to be free.” But in this lifetime, listening to such
tapes is not to their advantage. If they’re in a relationship, really
understanding what the other person is saying and creating
tremendous rapport, and all of a sudden “I’ve got to be free; I’ve got
to be free” comes on in their mind, they will pull themselves out of
the interaction. Then they go off by themselves and think they will
feel free, but instead they feel lonely (one more mountaintop!) and
say: “What’s going on? There’s no energy here at all.”
But it’s healthy for these folks to go back and say: “Gosh, I’ve
changed my mind.” This is not a lifetime where they have to be
right all the time. They need to be honest when they have two
different responses to something. For example, they may want to
stay in a relationship and at the same time fear that by staying they
won’t be able to do what they want to do. At that point, Gemini
North Node people need to honestly communicate their
dichotomies: “To tell you the truth, I’ve got two things going on
here. On the one hand I want to stay, on the other hand I’m afraid
that if I get really close I won’t be able to do the things on my own
that I need to do.” Or with their children they might say: “I
understand what’s going on with you and that you need a lot of
space, but we need to have a certain amount of discipline in this
family to make the unit work.” When they share both sides of the
issue, the answer will present itself. The person will understand
what they are saying and come into alignment with them.
Just being aware that they have “freedom tapes” is a big part of
resolving this issue. The tapes are like a muscle in the subconscious
that got overexercised, and now it’s going to assert itself at the most
inopportune times. So if they tune in to where the voice is coming
from, they can choose to not take it too seriously.
In many past lifetimes as spiritual counselors, mentors, or
advisors, Gemini North Node people have had to be in positions of
certainty when others expressed doubts and fears. Their
subconscious tells them: “You’re supposed to know all the
answers.” Their goals required complete faith and trust; so in this
lifetime, their subconscious tries to invalidate any fears or doubts
that come up.
They tend to rationalize by comparing themselves to others in
ways that invalidate their own feelings. For example, a Gemini
North Node person may say: “You know, I’m really not happy in
my job . . . but I don’t know what I want to do right now . . . and
I’m lucky to even have a job! And nobody likes their job!” These
folks present themselves as having it all figured out. They won’t
say: “I have no clue what I want to do with my life.” They’ll say
instead: “I’m planning to go to law school” and then give six
reasons why they’re doing it. They’ll even list the disadvantages:
“I’ve already thought about the negative side of it, but I think that’s
what I want to do.” When they present themselves to others as
having all the answers, this attitude cuts off—rather than invites—
the communication, interaction, and sharing that could provide them
with new information and insights.
They are hesitant to elicit the ideas and opinions of others
because they don’t want to feel weak—they don’t want to face the
fact that they actually don’t have all the answers. Because they are
afraid that the other person is going to tell them something they
don’t want to hear, they inadvertently converse in a way that
discourages others from having any input in the conversation. These
folks also fear that true communication with others might expose
something deeper about themselves, which would allow their fears,
doubts, and inner confusion to begin to rise.
Gemini North Node is learning that in society there is freedom
of choice. Not everyone is following the same set of rules. As each
one of us pursues our individual pathway, it’s okay to be uncertain
and have doubts and to have the humility to ask others for their
opinion—in fact, it’s encouraged. Cooperation empowers people to
use their talents to express themselves, achieve their desires, and do
things that benefit not only themselves but other people and society
as a whole.
On the mountaintop Gemini North Node people were on their
own, but in society we all have strengths and weaknesses. Folks get
together and share information—the plumber knows about
plumbing, the lawyer knows about law, and so on. However,
Gemini North Node people are not accustomed to seeking help.
They think it shows a lack of intelligence. Yet society operates from
the basic assumption that nobody knows everything. We’re all in the
same boat, so the person with the most expertise directs the ship.
Gemini North Node people may isolate themselves from the
comfort and camaraderie of interdependence because they are
resistant to other people telling them what to do, especially if the
others seem to know less about Truth than they do. However, in this
incarnation they must learn to live successfully in society—and
there are plenty of people who know more about that than they do!
Gemini North Node people should remember that humility is
beneficial because it allows them to listen to and learn from others.
They need to find out how to “be themselves” and still be a
cooperative part of society. Moreover, humility allows them to learn
that Truth is a universal energy that can come through anyone, so
they should be open to all points of view.
These folks are learning to accept duality: the contradictions in
others and the duality of their own natures. By pursuing only Truth
in past lives, they became isolated from the experience of being
human. In this incarnation, their mission is to learn about human
nature all over again.
Planet Earth runs on the principles of yin and yang, night and
day, cold and hot, receptive and creative, female and male—
seeming opposites that make a whole. Gemini North Node people
will better understand life, people, and situations when they see the
“flip side” of the coin. They are still learning to see, accept, and be
interested in both sides, rather than take the attitude that “It’s just a
coin; big deal.” Rather than discounting internal conflicts, they are
learning about the peace of mind that comes from honestly and
lovingly accepting the contradictory parts of their own nature.
Therefore, Gemini North Node people shouldn’t worry about
having the total picture. It’s okay for them not to “know”—in fact,
in this lifetime it’s preferable! Thinking they already know
everything blocks their openness to new information that might
improve their understanding of the situation.
These folks are also hesitant to tell people things because they
project that others don’t want to hear difficult truths. So when
someone tells them “I left this job,” “I broke up with so-and-so,” or
“I decided not to go to law school,” then the Gemini North Node
person will say: “I didn’t want to tell you, but I never liked him.”
Or, “I didn’t think law school was a good idea for you.” The other
person may say: “Why didn’t you tell me a long time ago?” But
these folks are afraid of hurting others by “speaking the truth.” They
need to recognize that simply expressing their own opinion might
be helpful to the other person.
However, the motive behind offering their opinion plays a vital
role in how their advice is received. If their motive is to offer love
and support, the other person will feel their good intention and be
open to their input. But if their motive is to be judgmental or to be
“right,” the other person will respond defensively. If Gemini North
Node people truly want to help, the interaction works smoothly.
They should offer their perception as another point of view, a gift of
caring, and let the other person figure out whether or not it’s right
for the situation at hand.
Gemini North Node people have a tendency to blind optimism
that can lead them to jump into things without thoroughly checking
all the facts. Sometimes they intuitively feel that someone is being
dishonest with them, but they may override that feeling with high
hopes for great returns and the attitude that “everything is going to
work out.” When they become aware of this imbalance, they need
to force themselves to acknowledge their other options. This will
restore their self-confidence.
When they recognize that they are not in a logical situation, they
need to fall back on their own strength. But they don’t always feel
capable of handling things. They tend to blindly trust people they
feel are better able to take care of themselves in the real world. And
because they are trustworthy, they project that others are
trustworthy as well—and this can get them into a lot of trouble.
These folks should rely on others to help them; however, they
should not do this blindly. Their challenge is to understand the
people around them, and not to trust just anyone out of fear that
they have no other choices. They need to listen to the other person’s
words, and because Gemini North Node people are basically
truthful, they can tell when others are not being truthful with them.
Gemini North Node people don’t necessarily expect the people
they’re with to tell them the truth. They think that other people
work from some other point of reference where it’s all right to be
dishonest, tell white lies, hide money, and so on. And since they
themselves would never do these things, they feel that others are
operating from a lesser level of integrity. Once again their past life
experience with its strict moral code comes into the picture, and
these folks have a tough time dealing with what they perceive to be
the “dishonesty and games” of other people.
These folks need to recognize that their function is to reinfuse
spiritual ethics and Truth into the mindsets of others. If they cast
others as being “wrong” for not being “moral,” naturally others will
resist their insights—no one wants to feel like a sinner! So they
need to support people in integrating the spiritual path into their
daily lives. At the same time, they must be open to other views and
temper the rigidity of their own position.
When Gemini North Node people give their word, they keep it—
it’s a matter of morality to them. And they expect those around
them to play by the rules both parties have agreed on. When other
people talk about doing something and then don’t do it—for
whatever reason—these folks can get extremely upset. They want
the initial agreement to be acknowledged, and they want to be
consulted about any changes.
For example, if they agreed to clean the attic with someone and
then something came up, they would say: “We said we were going
to clean the attic today, but it’s looking like we’re not going to have
time. Is everybody okay with that?” They hate things to be said and
then not followed up on. Yet they don’t know how to bring this trait
to other people’s attention—they don’t want to upset the others or
have them deny that the discrepancy is happening. It can be an area
of serious confusion for these folks.
When such discrepancies occur, it is usually for one of three
basic reasons:
1. It may be the result of an initial misunderstanding that
the Gemini North Node person let pass without
clarification, even though he didn’t feel good about it at
the time. If he has to clear up something from the past, he
needs to stay with the facts of the situation: “Yesterday I
heard you say _____, and now I hear you say _____.I
don’t understand the discrepancy. Will you please explain
this to me so I can understand better what you’re saying?”
If his motive is truly to understand, and not just wanting
to make the other person appear wrong, this approach will
work. Otherwise, the other person will become
uncomfortable and respond defensively.
2. The other person may not have really said what
Gemini North Node heard—there’s a lot of
miscommunication in these folks’ lives. If Gemini North
Node can remember the words closely, he can say:
“Yesterday I heard you say _____. Did you mean _____,
or did you mean something else?”
3. It is also possible that the other person felt strongly
about a situation one day, and then—due to a change in
circumstances, perception, or feedback—changed her
mind and felt just as strongly in another direction the
following day. Part of living in society is learning how to
adapt and change direction in response to feedback from
others. People put an idea out into the world, and
depending on how others respond to it, the idea is
continued or changed to best accomplish the goal. For
example, someone might be convinced that advertising in
Magazine A would increase business. Then, after getting
a limited response, he or she might be equally convinced
that Magazine A was not a good advertising bet, put an ad
in Magazine B, or use an entirely different media outlet.
Gemini North Node people might see these situations as
discrepancies, but they simply represent the process of intelligent
adaptation to feedback from the environment. From past lives in
religious environments, these folks are used to seeking eternal
truths: absolute universal laws that never change. But in this
incarnation they are learning to move about in a social environment,
and they need to have the humility to listen and learn about how the
rules work in this environment. Such recognition will also help
them be more open to others. Others’ responses can help these folks
determine whether or not they are truly making a contribution and
effectively adding positive energy to the situation.