“I have to go. You will be in danger if I take you with me or stay with you any longer. The soldiers are after me. Please understand. I wish I could help more than I already have. Just please, pay attention to the instructions. I really hope I could have talked with you longer.” I read underneath his shoulder, the words upside down. He glances at me and shoves over the note, standing up in the process. The notepad falls from his grasp onto my lap.

He stops as if to pick it up, and then decides not to. He starts to turn away from me, and I strangely feel sad. “You… keep… it.” The man looks over his shoulder with that wonderful grin of his.

“Have… everything.” He throws the knapsack over his shoulder, and then disappears almost immediately. I can sense the footsteps once more.

Good bye.

An eerie calm settles over me. I feel perfectly at peace with the world, satisfied with all it has offered me. Heaven did send me my own guardian angel, after all.

I finger the notepad tentatively. What do I want to write? How will I like to fill these pages before the pain comes back?

Images flash in my head, images that are all blurry. No, that just will not do. I cannot make a picture out of blurry. It simply isn’t possible.

Leafing through the few sketches in the front of the pad for inspiration, I stop on the portrait of a young, pretty girl. For some reason it strikes me, seemingly familiar to my eyes.

Exactly like my guardian angel.

A name whips out of nowhere, stunning me almost like another round of pain. Tears start to fall as the realization hits me. Mona. Mona is my name.

And his? I ask myself.

My memory grows clearer as the moon begins to soar in the wide sky. Xavier. That’s it.

“Xavier,” I whisper softly, tasting the word on my tongue. I have to repeat it once more, treating it like a rare delicacy.

“Xavier… why?” I ask the sky, not caring if my ears don’t pick up the words. Maybe if I was louder, they would.

“Xavier, please don’t leave me!”

Two, strong hands grab my side as I start to shake, clutching the sides of my desk. The world around me blurs, and quickly morphs into a classroom filled with empty desks. I am back in my prison.

“Mona, please calm down,” Mr. Vigilance says softly, “it is fine now. You are back.”

Tears are running down my face in rivers. He is right. I am safe.

Yet I cannot stop the tears from flowing.

“What did you see?” he asks, and the chills start to race down my back. I really did see Xavier. He is alive, and running from me.

I wanted to ask him why. I wanted to beg him to stay. But I never had the chance. And now he is gone forever.

I have had this dream countless times, but never before has it gone so far. The last time it happened was yesterday in bed, and ended right after I went to sleep. It is as if I finally unlocked the true story, and it scares me immensely.

“I saw a massive Shifter attack,” I choke out a lie, “they stormed the cities, too many for us to count. They all came back and multiplied, revived by some strange force. We could not handle them. Every one of us died.” I try to speak evenly, but I end up squeaking out every other word. A half-lie, of course. I had a vision like that the other day.

Mr. Vigilance raises a slender, perfect eyebrow. “Is that everything? Do you feel like this is some sort of premonition? Does this apply to the prophecy in any way?”

Oh… right, right. I forgot. This is Analysis class.

“Uh, no sir.” I finger the edges of the paper. “What do you think?”

He puffs up like some big elephant. I have given him the chance to talk, and he knows it. “Well… maybe…” He edges over to the chalkboard as he thinks.

Great. What have I gotten into?

***

An hour later, I struggle out of that class, nearly exhausted. That man has the ability to suck the life out of me, leaving absolutely nothing left. He droned on for at least thirty minutes without stopping about the possible meanings of my dream. Well, this time I brought it upon myself. I should be ashamed.

Now to get out of my etiquette class.

I edge over to the room where Lady Miranda was tending to some papers cluttered across her desk. “Excuse me, Lady Miranda?” I ask, making my voice as sickly sweet as I possibly can. She seems to be nicer when I talk this way.

“Mona? Is that you?” She looks up, her features spell-binding. Her emerald eyes contrast with flawless ivory skin and dark red lips, along with a swan-like neck and a graceful body. To me, she is like an icy goddess.

“Yes, Lady Miranda.” I curtsy clumsily, and I think I see amusement tug at the corner of her closed mouth. “I am feeling rather unwell today, and would like to use the bathroom. May I?”

She stares at me evenly. I begin to feel squirm, traces of red reaching my cheeks.

“I suppose so.” She throws her hands up like it couldn’t be helped. That was one thing about Lady Miranda. She was a drama queen. “But only-“

“Thanks!” I say eagerly, and then zoom off without a second thought. I know I will be reprimanded later, but I don’t care at all. It is worth everything to be free, if only for a couple of moments.

I hope Lady Miranda doesn’t notice that I didn’t turn to the left in order to go to the bathroom.

I exit the premises, swinging a door open so that I am standing in the backyard. Searching my mind for the place I had seen before, I wrinkle my nose in order to catch a scent. Any scent.

There are so many out here: daffodils, lilacs, frogs, and other creatures. But I know what I am looking for. When the hint of the right aroma reaches me, I grab on to it and never let go.

“Chosen One?” A voice calls in the distance. I mutter angrily under my breath. Move, Mona, move!

I run to the edge of the tall walls and jump as high as I can. Using my hands, I grab onto a small ledge, which I used to propel myself over. I have practiced this many times since I found the strange irregularity days ago. It serves as my ticket out, if need be. Although of course, it wouldn’t really free me from the prison, but I can temporarily get away. As long as the guards don’t see me.

Starting to hear shouts from far away, I try not to focus on it too much. I must hold on to that faded scent. It carries me farther in the forest, deeper than I previously thought.

I hope I don’t get lost.

I finally reach the familiar clearing, where the pond is only a few feet away. My eyes scan over the muddy pond, the deathly berries, and finally, the figure bundled against the tree.

The woman’s face is worn and weary, with many wrinkles upon her face. I can tell she used to be very pretty. She has a heart-shaped face and a slightly pointy nose.

She is scrunched up in the fetal position, her face bent in pain. I see the knapsack off to the side, the discarded water bottle, and the full bottle of pills. Oh, I see. She hasn’t been following the instructions.

There is dried up blood around the area, almost as if she was coughing it up earlier. It doesn’t look like she has any outward injuries.

“Okay, lady, let’s get you out of here.” I hoist her up in my arms slowly, and she is surprisingly light. Her eyes flutter open, and in that time I see piercing blue eyes stare straight into my soul. I am struck by the hopelessness I see within them, and then the fierce determination.

With a ferocity that is hard for even me to detect, she wraps her arms around my neck and begins to squeeze. Surprisingly, it hurts really bad for a lady who has barely any strength left.

“Please,” I emphasize, choking under her hold, “release… me… here… to… help.”

She studies my lips, trying to read the words that fell off my tongue. Her eyes narrow in suspicion, but reason takes over and she loosens her grip slightly. I gasp for air.

Looking around her, she reaches for the notepad, which was lying on the ground. I bent down and picked it up, handing it to her with interest. She flips through the pages as I begin the walk back, as if searching for something.

I hear a murmur, almost like a strange warble, coming from the lady as she finds the picture she is looking for. “You,” she mouths silently, pointing to the portrait of me on the back of one page. My eyes crinkle with laughter.

“Me,” I nod, and then start to run as fast as I can with the bundle in my arms. I am surprised that she weighs so little to me, but maybe it is the result of that strength training I have been forced to participate in. I am always the weakest one there, but maybe even I have improved.

Her eyes widen as I go into full speed, and subconsciously she clutches at my shirt. I have to get back as quickly as I can before the guards race after me and catch a whiff of Xavier’s scent. I cannot let them get that far into the forest.

A strange thought occurs to me. I could have left the lady and raced in Xavier’s direction. I could have caught his scent. Maybe even catch up with him.

Why didn’t I?

Well, I suppose it’s worth it anyway, I think to myself. At least I get to save someone out of my stupidity. And really, that’s probably what I would have done anyway if I had thought of this plan earlier. My presence with Xavier would have endangered him more than if I leave him alone. Disheartening as it is, it is still cold, hard reality.

And there is also the fact that he was the one that ran from me in the first place.

A strange squeezing in my chest brings me back to the present. I had barely realized that we have reached the wall until now. Crap, I forgot.

How am I going to get over this wall now? It isn’t like I can throw her over.

“What is that in your arms, Mona? What have you been doing?” A figure comes from the side of the walls, probably where the gate is. I gasp, nearly dropping the woman. I didn’t expect anyone to be out here.

But of course, it is Lady Miranda who decides to follow me outside the gates. Her eyebrows are arched in the air and her tone is full of fury. “What happened to going to the bathroom?”

I am going to die.

Instead of responding to her, I gently try to place the woman’s feet on the ground. A guard comes around the other side in curiosity, and I quickly gesture for him to come over. He looks at me and the lady in confusion.

“Can you take care of this lady? She ate some poisonous berries… they were red, and small, and-“

“Metaberries?” he asks suddenly. He seems like he knows what he is talking about.

“Uh… yeah. Sure. Metaberries.”

“I will take care of her, Chosen One.” The guard reaches out an arm to hold the woman up. She doesn’t protest, allowing him to support her weight. It seems like she can walk, though awkwardly. At the moment she must not be in dire pain.

“Please see that she gets a job in Headquarters!” I call after him urgently. He lifts up one hand in parting, and then they disappear around the side of the walls. It is then that I notice that the notepad, once more, is on the ground. The pages are flipped to a picture I have never seen before. Tears well up as I see the fine lines, the bright eyes and smooth skin. Xavier. She had drawn Xavier.

“You have a lot of explaining to do,” Lady Miranda huffs, by my side in seconds. Using her arm, she firmly guides me over to the gateway. My few minutes of freedom are over.

All the while, I clutch the notepad close to my chest. Somehow I am unable to keep the tears from falling.

This is going to be a long week.

***

Days later, I am still just as dumb as I was the moment I started taking these awful classes. I think Lady Miranda has had me thrown out more than three times, and Mr. Vigilance has turned each class into a “brainstorming” period where he basically lectures the entire time over the possible meanings of my dream. Not the real dream, of course, so it wasn’t even slightly interesting.

The only times when I enjoy myself would have to be when Griffin is by my side. He visits me for lunch and always makes me laugh so that I choke on my bland PB&Js. He is becoming my best friend, understanding and caring about me more than anyone else in this boring place. I am starting to think that having him as my only mate wouldn’t be quite as bad.

Walking towards the garden where I eat my lunch, I spot him leaning against the statue near the doors. He smiles when he turns to look at me, a smile so unguarded that it makes my heart flutter. He quickly strikes a pose, kneeling in front of the statue’s outstretched sword with a wounded expression.

I start to laugh, running over to him. “Watch out!” I yell, “You are going to get hurt!” I leap in the air and push him out of the way. We crash into the wall, his body shielding me from any damage. I look into his brown eyes with relief. He seems to be the most human-like person here, and I love that more than anything.

“Get… up,” Griffin groans, trying to push himself off the floor. He looks hurt, but the twinkle in his eyes betrays the truth.

“What were you thinking, getting in front of that soldier?!” I roll off of him, shaking him by the shoulders. “You could have died!”

“Would you miss me?” He winks, slowly standing up.

“Yes. I would miss you so much,” I say sarcastically, drawing out my syllables. Afterwards, I yawn, and his grin reappears.

“Are you bored with me already, Chosen One?” he teases, and I punch him in the arm. He knows I hate it when he calls me that.

Offering me his arm, he leads me out into the garden. The nervous butterflies return as we walk, upsetting my stomach.

“Are you ready?” He whispers in my ear, a low sound that makes me shiver. I know exactly what he is talking about.

“Ready as I will ever be, I guess.” I look towards the walls, away from him. Griffin frowns a little.

“I know this must be nerve-wracking. What are you worried about?” he asks, leading me to the benches underneath the tall willow tree. Flowers surround us as we sit down, and I open my lunch bag.

“I’m not sure. It is just this uneasy feeling I have. I don’t know if I am ready.” I grab my sandwich, staring at it silently. The delectable scent reaches my nose, and I nearly gag.

“I’m sure you are more ready than you think.”

“Or maybe you have more confidence in me than you should.”

A minute passes with no words. I quietly put my sandwich up and he starts to eat his own. It is a comfortable silence, a silence I can bear. With Griffin, I always feel at ease.

“If you want, Mona, we can do it now. Get it over with. I know that the Council has had it ready for ages,” Griffin comments nonchalantly over a mouthful of BLT. “They just wanted to wait until you decided to come. Of course, the deadline is tonight, but you could have-“

“Really?” I ask, a little more eager than I should be. I have been dreading this ritual for days, unable to keep the nervousness from swallowing up all of my thoughts. “Let’s do it, then.”

I marvel at how I spoke of this matter so calmly. The way I said it was about the equivalent of “let’s play ball!” or “let’s eat some cake!”. I guess it is just the overwhelming desire for everything to just be over. To forget… him, to move on with my life.

“Griffin, wait for me, will you?” I ask, standing up quickly, “I have to do something, and then we can go.” He nods, and takes another gigantic bite of his sandwich. Turning from him, I head over to the fountain around thirty feet away.

For a minute, I stare at the glassy water, my reflection wavy in the ripples across the surface. Hesitantly I put my hand in my pocket and pull out a tiny slip of paper. Unfolding it, I look at the striking portrait once again. My thumb smudged the edge of his face, and I quickly shift it away.

I returned the notepad to the old lady, whose name is Cassie, by secret. I snuck into her new room and left it on her bed. However, I could not part with this picture no matter how hard I tried. I eventually tore it out, stealing away the precious lady’s guardian angel.

But now, it is time.

My heart twists in pain violently as I raise my thumbs to the top of the picture and carefully bring them out in opposite directions. The tearing sound makes my eyes start to water, and before I know it, the deed is done. My heart is ripped in two pieces just as easily as the paper was.

Now the job gets much harder.

Let go.

I squeeze each piece of the paper tightly in my fists. It seems as if my body will not obey my mind’s commands.

Let go.

Finally one hand opens, and the paper flies until it lands on the blue water. It floats for a while, and then the water swallows it up until it is shriveled and the face is destroyed.

Only one piece left.

Although it may seem like a small matter, at this moment it seems like the world depends on this one action. My grip slowly loosens in the other hand, sweat appearing on my palm. I never imagined that this would become so hard.

Let go.

The paper flies in the same direction that the other did, and soon shrivels in the same manner. Strangely, it feels as if I have been temporarily released… almost energized at its completion. Not exactly what I expected.

With energy I didn’t know I possessed, I walk over to Griffin, who probably saw the entire incident. “Okay,” I say firmly, “I am ready.”

I finally let go.

We reach the entrance of a small room after a short while, having traveled slowly but surely. It seems to be in the heart of headquarters, several flights of stairs underground. It is kind of creepy, knowing that with every step I am taking I am getting closer to becoming a brand new person.

It is hard to imagine what I will be like when it is over. Will my personality change to what it was before I met… him? Will I keep everything but my memories?

Griffin keeps trying to explain the process of the ritual, but I get distracted by the curious designs that are dancing across the walls of this hallway. There are no other doors besides the one at the very end, which is rather strange. The door itself is huge, decorated with similar designs around the edges. The whole layout of Headquarters confuses me. It is rather like a castle upside down, with a single, plain floor above ground and many more beautiful floors below.

We enter through the door, and I am surprised by the simplicity of it all. There is nothing in it besides a few chairs, a desk and cabinets, and a small bed. It rather resembles a normal hospital room, and even that seems more homely than this one. It is very different from everything else I have seen on this floor.

An old, yet striking lady is murmuring to herself, seemingly stirring together a strange concoction in a large mixing bowl. She is dressed in all black and has beady eyes, with dark hair that stretches to her lower back. If I didn’t know better, I’d think that I have just seen a witch.

“Mona, meet our herbalist, Marsha.” Griffin smiles at her, and I extend my hand cautiously. She turns to look at me, stares at my hand for a minute, and then turns away.

My cheeks burn as I hastily drop my hand to my side. Griffin doesn’t seem to notice my embarrassment, acting as if she hadn’t just snubbed me in front of him. “She will be taking care of the ritual, Mona. You have nothing to worry about. She is the best of the best.”

He obviously expects me to be eased by this knowledge. Honestly, it upsets me even more. This lady looks like she could kill me. Not only kill me, but not care about it in the slightest.

“Leave.” A small croak comes from Marsha, and we both take a step back. “I must deal with her alone.”

Marsha. What a witchy name.

Griffin shakes his head. “I’m sorry Marsha, but the Council said-“

“I do not care what the Council said!” She shakes her head definitely, her voice cracking on every other word. “I am doing them a favor right now, and they know it.”

Griffin stares at me pleadingly. “Yeah, yeah, I get it,” I mutter underneath my breath, “go wait outside.” Smiling, he pats me on the head and walks out of the door.

“I’ll be right here! Call if you need me!” He throws over his shoulder, and then the door shuts with a frightening CLANG!!

Now I am alone with this scary witch-lady. I knew I never should have gone along with this.

She gestures to the bed, and I quickly scramble upon it. The energy I had before is completely gone. How did I lose my confidence so quickly?

“Mona, I am going to have to ask you to relax,” she says calmly over her shoulder, “I can feel your teeth chattering like footsteps on a rainy day.”

What? What did that analogy have to do with anything?

She finishes her mixture, and then takes a cup out of the cabinet and pours some of the concoction into it. “Parsley, Gingerberries, Red Snaps, Fargleweed, Cabbage, and Tawniberries. Pretty normal ingredients, except for the Gingerberries, until swirled together for thirty minutes, boiled for ten minutes, and then allowed to fester for three days. Now it serves as a concoction that is so potent you cannot drink but a sip before the agony overtakes you. It is the first step to ridding yourself of your mate.” After explaining, she takes a dropper and dips it in the cup. I am only thinking of one thing.

Gingerberries?

GINGERBERRIES?

“Secondly,” she continues, “I have to take another thick mixture, using extremely rare ingredients, and spread it across the mating mark you wish to remove. I have been informed that this mark is near your neck.” Stepping over to me, she places the dropper on a small bedside table and went to get something else.

“Afterwards, I will use Fargleweed to soothe your evaporating mating mark and the pain in your chest. However, it may continue regardless for hours. Even if you are hurting after I am through with this step, I must give you the elixir or it will never be complete. This is the potion that messes with your mind, fiddling with your memories and truly making you forget him.”

“Let’s get on with it then,” I mutter, lying back against the single pillow. “Bring on the pain.”

She smiles, a wicked smile that chills me to the bone. “As you wish.”

A few minutes pass as she arranges things on the table. I spend time thinking about what I was going to lose. Throughout this process, will I lose myself? Why did I even agree to do this?

Oh yeah. The pain.

That is so funny to me, and I start to laugh. So in order to escape from the pain, I must drink something that gives me pain. What a messed up world.

Marsha arches an eyebrow, and I shrug. “I’m weird,” I offer as an explanation. I’m sure she thinks I’m crazy now.

I think she is ready, for she is picking up the dropper. “Open up, Mona.” Obediently I do as she asks, closing my eyes in the process. The word why keeps flitting through my thoughts.

Why, why, why, why, WHY?

A small droplet of liquid hits my tongue, and I begin to scream. It seems as if my body is on fire, lit into flames by that one single spark. She was right. The pain really does overtake you.

I can feel Marsha’s hands on me, forcibly holding me down. Strange bindings are suddenly around my feet and arms. Anger at her sears me like a red-hot iron. What the crap was I thinking when I agreed to do this?

Crashes r heard outside, along with shouting and other strange noises. I barely notice, mainly because I am busy writhing in pain.

“Not too much longer dearie,” Marsha cackles, her aged hands spreading a gooey paste around my neck. At about this time, an even larger crash occurs, and I can hear Griffin yelling, “Guards! GUARDS!”

I think Marsha has messed up for some reason, because now I can feel the paste on my shirt and jeans. Some of it gets on my belly and sides because my shirt had ridden up slightly. The burn intensifies when this happens, and I am unable to stop from screaming again.

“What are you doing to her?” A voice anxiously asks, a voice that is familiar to me. “What are you doing to Mona?!”

Marsha doesn’t say anything from the silence that follows, and then croaks in my ear. “Drink this.” A cup touches my lips and a sweet liquid slides into my mouth. Not much, though, but something knocks the cup from my lips.

“Stop!” Another voice yells, and fighting ensues. I finally decide to open my eyes, to figure out what is going on.

A face hovers above me, streaked with moisture. It takes a minute for my eyes to focus, but then I realize it is him. My body starts to shake and stars dance in my vision. “Mona, it’s me,” the familiar voice whispers, “Xavier. I came back.”

A strange exhilaration fills my body. He… he came back. For me. Somehow it is impossible to believe.

“I may not ever see you again,” he whispers, “because the guards are coming this way to kill us. But I had to see you just one more time. I love you. I can’t live without you.”

My heart nearly explodes.

Through all the burning pain, I focus on my one desire that rises above the others; the urge to escape… with Xavier, with Griffin, with everyone. Somehow, I needed to save them all. Even if I die in the process.

Places appear before me randomly. The werewolf mansion. My orphanage. My school. Strange valleys, and creeks, and towering mountains that I have never seen before.

Another vision settles before me, a vision of dark rivers and forests, vast oceans and dark grey skies. There.

I reach for it, grasping for the place that has haunted my dreams since the very first Shifter attack. The others cannot reach us there. We will be safe.

In my strange state of delirium, I run and catch it in my hands, and then stare at it, expecting something. Anything.

And then something happens.

The light from the place grows, consuming my hand, my arms, and my body. It sucks up everything, until nothing is left. Surely I have gone mad. What have I done?

My consciousness leaves me as I finally pass out, due to the agonizing pain.

What a nightmare.